This is the best way I can explain how I feel right now. I imagine my heart being made up with little pieces of love that I acquire along the journey of my life. When that love was taken little fragments of my heart went with it. And I mended it in the only way I personally knew how. I duct taped mine, so to speak, a temporary fix, by forcing the memories to go away. But, they were a part of me creeping up and haunting me. Nudging me, pushing me to act, address them, and move on.
Today my heart seems to be singing with the choir of Angels. Overnight that duct tape was gently peeled away and my heart instead of a temporary fix was fussed back together with the love once lost and required again. I spent two wonderful days talking with my sister. I remember as a little girl loving her so much and wanting to be just like her. But, because of life, the lies we’d been told, and fear engraved in us, we just stayed away from one another. But, we talked straightened miss understandings out and decided to work together.
She brought me things from her father’s house (my step-fathers house) that she thinks may help as evidence in the case. For many reasons I can’t yet share it with you but, I can say that we are sending it out to private labs for testing. I pray that they find something. Yet, Even if they don’t, I found something. Someone to talk with that lived the nightmare with me. Someone who wants to get to the bottom of this case. And someone who may have the ability to help with that.
I talked to my step-brother the one I have told you about. The one I was so very close to as a little girl. Oh my goodness he was so funny. He’s not crazy, as I was told. He’s learned from his journey through life and a deeper understanding of life, more than most of us learn in a life time. I am going to ask him to write down some of what he told me so I can share it with you.
What a wonderful Christmas for me. I received the kind of gifts that only Heaven can bring. I have to tell you the piece of my heart that had been broken, by loving a sibling and having them ripped out of my life with nothing but sad memories attached to them. All those haunting memories healed by the power of knowledge. Knowing they are going to be just fine. That they are no longer suffering. It took one phone call to completely change my perspective. It made me wonder how many phone calls each of us could make. How many lives could be changed for the better by one simple call. To a friend, neighbor, relative…, a simple prompting to call to reach out literally changed something inside of me. My goal this coming up year is to never ignore a prompting to do little things for others. I do have the power to change a piece of the world, so do you. Follow those sweet whispering of heaven. It’s the little things that change the world.